Boob Jokes in Math Class
Growing up in Dolly Parton’s Appalachia
My seventh-grade math teacher began a lesson about improper fractions by telling us they were actually called “Dolly fractions.” Twenty-seven 12-year olds stared back at him.
“Get it? Because they’re bigger on top than they are on the bottom… like Dolly Parton.”
A few students chuckled nervously. Others sat and thought, “Did my teacher just make a boob joke?” He extended the metaphor by explaining the different ways we could add (Dolly on Dolly), subtract (Dolly got a boob job), multiply (Dolly times Dolly), or divide improper fractions (Dolly got a breast reduction). Not exactly high-minded or medically accurate humor. It was August 2001, one month before September 11th. I was 12 and just beginning to recognize sexism and misogyny veiled as humor.
Dolly Parton’s Appalachia
For context, I grew up in a rural county in East Tennessee. Specifically, the county next to Sevier County, where Dolly was born. This was years before the Dolly Moment, which Tressie McMillan Cottom discusses beautifully in the linked piece. In 2001, Dolly was both beloved and derided, exalted and defamed. Her talent, charisma, and longevity were acknowledged, but she was also joked about with impunity. As Dolly herself says in the Peabody Award-winning podcast, Dolly Parton’s America, “I know some of the best Dolly Parton jokes. I made ’em up myself.”
Growing up where and when I did meant not only hearing Dolly’s music and watching her movies, but also hearing how people talked about women in power. I heard about how Dolly was “puttin’ on a show, dressin’ like that,” and how much makeup was too much because you don’t want to “look fake like Dolly.” So much of the commentary on beauty warned women not to be “too much.” Dolly, they said, could get away with it because she was Dolly. The rest of us needed to be quiet, wait our turn, and wear a neutral lip color.
Learning from Dolly
A few years later, I was hanging out with friends when someone made a Dolly joke. I don’t remember if it was about her breasts, her voice, her makeup, or her marriage. But I do remember another (very wise) friend’s response. “She’s fucking Dolly Parton. She doesn’t even know you exist.”
While I did know this guy existed, I was comforted by the idea that a person’s opinion of you could just… not matter. Not every joke or comment requires a response. But, if you have to respond, respond like Dolly.
In my work as a trainer, teacher, and speaker, I often run into devil’s advocates who like to hear their own voices. Sometimes their comments come from a genuine place of ignorance. Other times it’s a case of what-about-ism meant to derail a conversation. Dolly was and is an expert at using humor in response to sexist nonsense. Below are a few quotes from Dolly that I read when I’ve heard negative feedback, gotten pushback on an idea, or experienced sexism.
“I’m not offended by all of the dumb blonde jokes because I know I’m not dumb … and I also know that I’m not blonde.”
If you know you have a great idea, don’t waste time being offended. This quote was also one of the first times I saw a woman acknowledge unnatural hair color. Dolly is open about her hair, makeup, plastic surgery, and the benefits of good lighting. I also love how she addresses the “dumb” part of the critique before the “blonde” part.
“I look totally artificial, but I am totally real, as a writer, as a professional, as a human being. A rhinestone shines just as good as a diamond. ”
We see a near-constant stream of appearance-related critiques. Dolly is just one person, but she’s had more questions about her appearance than many celebrities put together. Whenever interviewers try to steer the conversation toward her appearance, Dolly deftly directs their attention back to her work.
“The way I see it, if you want the rainbow, you got to put up with the rain.”
Dolly is 75 years old. In her life, she has dealt with poverty, sexism, death, corrupt record deals, and more. Choosing to sing, act, or write for a living guarantees a rainy forecast. Especially at the beginning, you’ll get more rejections than acceptances. Each of these rejections can teach us how to improve or how to adapt to a new situation.
Dolly is a complicated figure. Anyone with a career as long as hers can’t be perfect 100% of the time. But, her ability to use humor as a communication tactic has been so helpful to me.
I don’t think my math teacher knew he was teaching a lesson on sexism when he introduced us to improper fractions. He probably just thought it was clever, but he was actually teaching my classmates that it was ok to make fun of women’s bodies. Sexism veiled as “just a joke” is harmful because it tries to make it the recipient’s fault (“no sense of humor,” “stuck-up”).
Hearing jokes about Dolly made an impact on me as a child, but Dolly’s responses to the jokes made an even bigger impression.
My experience of Dolly Parton’s Appalachia is a tiny piece of the story. If you want to learn more, see below.
Sociologist Tressie McMillan Cottom beautifully breaks down Dolly’s complicated relationship to whiteness, gender, and performance in this great essay: The Dolly Moment: Why we stan a post-racism queen
Host by Jad Abumrad, Dolly Parton’s America is a 9-part podcast exploring Dolly’s cultural significance. It features interviews with Dolly herself.
Dolly has also written several books about her life and career.
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